The Licensed Confidant Blog Posts
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These are a selection of diverse articles that I have written for various organisations and online platforms. They don’t follow a particular pattern or theme, except that they are all about well-being. I sincerely welcome your feedback and your questions. Please use the contact form to offer your feedback or ask any questions that you may have about the topics discussed. Thank you.
Mental Strength Matters
The positive dimension of mental health is emphasised in the World Health Organization's (WHO's) definition of health, which states that “Health is a state of complete physical, mental and social well-being and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity.”
Subclinical Symptoms
There are many individuals who experience low-level and perhaps short-lived mental health problems that are serious enough to affect their personal and professional lives, but not so obvious (at least externally), or sufficiently severe to qualify as a diagnosable disorder.
Helping Relationships
There are a few questions posed by Carl Rogers to help us analyse our readiness to build a helping relationship. The idea is that if we can clearly answer yes to most of these questions, we should be able to build a helping relationship. Otherwise, we need to work on our own personal development first.
Motivational Interviewing
Motivational Interviewing (MI) is a counselling, coaching or therapy approach that attempts to move an individual away from a state of ambivalence (indecision or uncertainty) towards finding the motivation necessary for making positive decisions and accomplishing a goal. Essentially, MI activates client’s capabilities required for a beneficial change.
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) is based on the concept that our emotions, thoughts and behaviours are interconnected (effect each other), and correctly changing one of them can break the vicious circle of our problems, and improve our feelings and performance. CBT was invented by Aaron Beck, in the 1960s.
Applied Positive Psychology
Positive Psychology is known as the scientific study of optimal human functioning. It focuses on how we flourish both in our personal and professional lives. Positive psychology started (1998) as a movement that tried to shift the perspective of the science of psychology more to the positive, and extend its application to the advancement of human strengths, well-being and flourishing.
Should I Seek Help?
Should I continue with self-help techniques, or seek professional help? Deciding to seek help is not always easy. The fear of being criticised or stigmatised could lead people to avoid seeking help. However, seeking help and support is indeed a sign of strength and the first step to a better life.
Emotional Blackmail
At times, we all have to make compromises. However, falling into a pattern of giving in, almost all the time, particularly on the issues that are against our wishes, needs and values, is demeaning and dangerous. Social influencing techniques becomes emotional blackmail when they are used repeatedly to coerce us into complying at the expense of our own feelings, wishes, well-being and dignity.
A Little Daisy and Its Life's Purpose
Once upon a time, there was a little wild but brilliant daisy in a large meadow. The meadow was beautiful, vast and full of rich varieties of flora and fauna. The daisy stood on a raised part of the land that allowed her to see almost the entire meadow and beyond.
Growth-mindset Vs Fixed-mindset
Our mindset is what makes us optimistic or pessimistic. It shapes our attitude and it is the ultimate factor which determines our success or failure. Dr Dweck believes that we basically have either a fixed-mindset, which implies that we believe our attributes and abilities are inherently fixed and unchanging, or a growth-mindset that suggests we believe our talents and abilities can be improved and developed.
Positive Psychological Interventions
Positive Psychological Interventions (PPIs) are theoretically-grounded and empirically-validated instructions, activities, and recommendations that are designed to enhance wellbeing (Lomas, Hefferon & Ivtzan, 2014). Moreover, PPIs focus on using positive emotions and strengths to achieve and/or boost wellbeing.
Positive Psychology & Businesses
People often ask me how businesses can benefit from positive psychology, and if my consultancy services are only for the businesses that are in trouble, performing poorly, and losing money. Of course, tough times make some entrepreneurs and managers more open to new ideas, but such situations also restrict their budget and make it difficult for them to involve consultants, or to invest on innovative solutions.
Appreciative Inquiry
Appreciative Inquiry (AI) was first developed in 1987 at Case Western University by David Cooperrider and Suresh Srivastva. It is an approach that is incorporated into positive psychology with great results. Contrary to problem-focused techniques, AI is an outcome directed technique which transforms an undesirable situation to an environment of sustainable growth and development.
Unsung Heroes
Throughout history, heroes and heroines are characters that, in the face of danger and adversity, and sometimes from a position of weakness, display courage and the will for self-sacrifice for some greater good. On the other hand, villains and villainesses are usually bad people who fight against the heroes and heroines.
Positive Aging
Life expectancy has improved considerably during the past couple of decades, and increasingly more people look forward to twenty years or more of life after retirement. But, the growing number of older-adults, and the rising proportion of them to younger population, provide both challenges and opportunities for society (Merriam & Kee, 2014).
Spiritual Health
Ironically, our spirituality comes into our focus mostly in times of distress, serious illness, or bereavement. For some, spirituality is equated with traditional religions, for others, it may mean being at peace and harmony with humanity or with nature.
Integrated Positive Practice
The book starts with an introduction to the authors’ multidimensional approach to wellbeing. Here, they have used Ken Wilber’s Integral Framework and Bronfenbrenner’s experimental ecology to develop a new multidimensional model called ‘LIFE’. The LIFE model is used as a conceptual map for their discussion throughout the book. I particularly like the motto that they proposed for PP; ‘to make life better’.
Things That Happens To Us
Everything that happens to us now is the result of actions (our own and others). Everything that will happen to us in the future results from actions taken so far and the actions that will be taken from now on.
Appreciative Coaching
The aim of appreciative coaching (AC) is to apply the principles of appreciative inquiry (AI) to personal coaching process by using constructive questioning (involving others, where appropriate) to remain positive throughout the process, to boost the clients’ ability to identify and use all their strengths and resources (particularly their support network), and achieve their goals in a sustainable way.
Positive Psychology and the Body
The book aims to provide an overview of the huge quantity of scientific research into the relationship between our bodies and experiences of momentary pleasure or long-term feelings of meaning and self-actualisation. The book is a critical reflection of the fact that the role of the body has been mostly overlooked in positive psychology.